Funny Kids Poems

I tend to write funny kids poems when I sit down to write for myself. It's been a long time since I was a kid. But I like to amuse myself, and I'm always in search of everything funny. (Life isn't fun when you're too serious!)

The first poem is Tissue Box.  Its inspiration is obvious. 

Funny Kids Poem #1

TISSUE BOX
How many sneezes
and coughs and ker-chews?
How many nose wipes?
And tear drops?
A few.
How many damp wads
Get thrown in the basket?
The trash can, the waste pile?
The used-tissue casket?
How many wipes on your poor, drippy snout?
How many pulls till the box just runs out?
Who says it matters?
You run out, and then ..
You go to the store for a new box again.

by Denise Rodgers
Copyright©Denise Rodgers
All rights reserved.
Permissions

Funny Kids Poem #2

The second poem is Bee. This poem was inspired by a journal writing session, during which a bee came buzzing outside my window, banging repeatedly into my window screen. (Yay screen!)

BEE
A bee comes tapping at my screen,
Buzzing, bumping, sounding mean.
Bouncing, pushing, acting wired,
With no thought of getting tired.


I could say, 
“Dear bee, what is it?
Would you like to come and visit?”

But I feel his anger’s keen.
So I’m glad I have a screen!

by Denise Rodgers
Copyright©Denise Rodgers
All rights reserved.
Permissions

Funny Kids Poem #3

The next funny poem is Creative Ken. This one was inspired by my love of thick-pointed, black-ink pens. That is where most of my writing originates these days before it makes its way to my computer.

CREATIVE KEN
Creative Ken
Got a brand new pen
All filled with dark black ink.
He started to write with all of his might
About everything he could think.

He wrote about moose
In the wild and set loose.
He wrote about merchants and kings.
He wrote about night
And he absence of light.
He wrote about so many things.

He wrote about Kansas, he wrote about Maine.
He wrote of the land and the sea.
He wrote every day
In his own special way
And he felt that his words set him free.

His pen kept on moving, his words never stopped
As he wrote about all that he knew
“For as long as I’ve ink
I’ll write what I think
And I’ll never or ever be through.”

by Denise Rodgers
Copyright©Denise Rodgers
All rights reserved.
Permissions

Funny Kids Poem #4

The last of the funny poems (on this page at least) is Dandelion. It is inspired by my love of this much-maligned "flower." It's a shame we spend so much money (and despoil our environment) in an effort to destroy them each year!

DANDELION
A field of yellow on the green.
I think it makes a lovely scene. 
If not stopped, they sprout and grow.
I think it makes a lovely show.

So full and lush,
All you could need.
A shame to think
They’re called a weed.

by Denise Rodgers
Copyright©Denise Rodgers
All rights reserved.
Permissions

If you like the funny kids poems on this page, keep in mind that a whole BOOK of poems just like them are available on this site. Please also see our terms of use.

Funny Kids Poem #5

I have no idea why I wrote this poem. It came to me in a flash and I hurried to write it down. That is what happens when you read and write poetry consistently. Some of it is written slowly, over time, and some of it comes out in a burst, no pun intended. This poem might be slightly subversive in polite society. But it is short, sweet (not sure about sweet, actually) and it has more than a kernel of truth. 

THE SCOOP
Please listen closely
As here is the scoop.
We all have to eat,
and we all have to poop.
Your father, your mother,
Your sister, your brother.
Your teacher,
Your preacher.
And every live creature.
It is a fact
That we have this in common.
We all do our business
And then wipe our bottom.

by Denise Rodgers
Copyright©Denise Rodgers
All rights reserved.
Permissions